“Thus we never see the true state of our condition till it is illustrated by its contraries; nor know how to value what we enjoy, but by the want of it.” Daniel Defoe [Robinson Crusoe]
It's official, I've become one of those people. People who I have previously dubbed as actually quite rude. People constantly on their mobile phone, constantly online, updating various statuses with life information few people actually care about. Hooked.
I am far from tech-savvy, but recently acquired a brand new phone. A phone with 'apps' and internet access. In fact, I could actually update my blog from there (if, y'know, I had got used to typing on the thing at all yet...). It seems that in this society even the least technical of us cannot escape, and eventually we'll all be online all the time. The pace of life seems to be increasing, everyone is always on the go...God forbid I get left behind.
This postsecret made me laugh. A lot. Along with the novelty of the internet, I am now obsessed with all the applications I can download. And one of the first? Angry Birds, recommended by my boyfriend (who consequently kept stealing my phone to play it, as he can't get it on his Blackberry). Can I hear you say 'addictive'?!
It is indeed a sad truth that, in today's technically advancing, ever-changing, world people are constantly 'logged on'. I honestly hope that my personal phone addiction will wear off as the novelty does, but I somehow can't see it. Gone are the days where you're not in constant contact with everyone you know. Gone are the days of simple country walks, trips far out with no contact with the outside world. We're all 'logged on'. We're all up to date. And we all love it, or (even worse) can no longer live without it.
In the early hours of this morning I arrived home after 10 glorious days in sunny Ibiza with my amazing family. And already I am flung back to a harsh, harsh reality.
You'd think that returning to a house damaged by water after terrible rain and storms in the area would be the main concern. And, being British, I suppose I have to have my complaint about the weather in here somewhere.
But no. In the grand scheme of things, that water damage doesn't really matter at all. It's not like we can change the weather.
No, what is really concerning, and almost unbelievable, is how I've just come from a country of sun, no worries and the 'party in the Spar' to a one not only dismally depressing in terms of weather, but also overwhelmed by riots and violence. I've returned to a country of destruction at the hands of it's inhabitants. A country of fire and murder and hate.
I'm not going to pretend to know a lot about what's going on. I'm not one to stay completely up to date with news stories and, having been away, I'm even more out of the loop than normal. It would be impossible NOT to know a few details, though, with the news of the violence even reaching across the oceans.
I'm thankfully not in an area that has been affected (if the situation elsewhere weren't so horrific, the thought of riots occuring in this small retirement town would be quite laughable) but that doesn't mean I'm not absolutely terrified for those I know (and don't know) who ARE in these areas. I just don't understand it.
Part of me wishes, however selfish this wish might be, that I could go back to lying in the sun, Sex on the Beach in hand, with no worries at all.
Being an English student, and a girl with a thirst for knowledge and far too much time on her hands, I read a lot. And I spend a large proportion of my money on books. Just yesterday, for example, I paid a visit to a charity bookshop in town to see if any books I need for my course next year were there. What did I leave with? A 3-volume collection of British Poetry, and a large book about Eighteenth Century England. For my course? Don't be silly [though the latter may be useful as I am studying some Eighteenth Century literature next year]. I am noticing, however, that I am suddenly becoming overwhelmed by literature of various sorts. I need a library. A traditional home library. It is one of my greatest dreams, actually, being the cool kid that I am, to have a library to house all my books in, to sit and read and write in, to relax in. Needless to say, in these first few lazy days of Summer this fantasy has swarmed my mind. And I have fed it. Picture time!
And in my library, along with many many books and my amazing old typewriter (courtesy of my grandad), I would have a traditional globe. It just completes the look...
[my personal favourite...no points for guessing why!]
And, although my heart is clearly set on the traditional look, I can't help but share the following picture. Totally cool!
My blog has been shamefully neglected for almost a year now. Whilst I recover my blogging muse, here are some music videos from a new favourite band of mine (since I attended Download festival last weekend): D.R.U.G.S.
Enjoy. x
Please excuse the fact that the videos don't fit. I am html illiterate. Blame it on the books.
**This is a very 'un-me' type blog post, to be sure, but something my friend said to me got me thinking that it might be a good topic nonetheless. Now, being bored and needing to update, I return to this thought as no other seems to be appearing in my blogging brain. How sad.**
In a typically girly discussion quite a few days back now, my friend put a most interesting thought into my head: is sex the reason why relationships nowadays breakdown so much more often than those of generations past? This seems odd. We hear so often of relationships breaking down because of a lack of sex so how on earth could having sex be a contributing factor to break ups and divorce? Let me clarify. Perhaps it is the case that couples in previous generations last longer because they didn't rush into anything, they didn't have sex so early and actually got to know each other first. Relationships were not centred around sex. Well, this does, to an extent, make sense. Relationships now, at least amongst young adults, do seem predominantly sexual. Relationship = sex. It's pretty much all people seem to talk about. Factor in the amount of unprotected sex, and one night stands, leading to pregnancy and...voila! You're stuck. Ultimately, having sex earlier on, even before the relationship has become a relationship, leads to you having less chance to get to know the person before you actually commit. Of course, all this is said with the assumption that sex automatically ties in with commitment, with something deeper than the act itself. In today's more sexually permissive society, is this really the case? Most would say not, and so the argument set out by my friend becomes invalid. Or not. As much as we might like to assure ourselves that sex is just sex, that there is no emotional tie whatsoever, I am inclined to believe that this is not necessarily true. Now, in some cases it most certainly IS true, don't get me wrong. But, especially for girls, sex is often something more. Not necessarily something "special", certainly not always an act of "love" and "commitment", BUT there is some emotion there. We can't help it, it's in our hormones. Sex doesn't have the same connotations that it had in generations past. It's not always waited for until we're absolutely, completely in love, and that is not a bad thing. But, the thought my friend has is an interesting one. Maybe because we are now so blase about sex, relationships become blase as well. Maybe sex has more of an unconscious effect on us than we are aware of, or like to admit. People have sex, form some unconscious emotional attachment in their head, realise they don't actually like the person and...there you have it, another failed relationship. People go ahead and have sex before they perhaps should and so, indirectly, sex (or rather, rushing into it) could well be the reason (or at least one reason) why so many relationships today end up breaking down. However, is it really accurate to claim that people today rush into relationships whereas those in the past were thought about with care and consideration, not rushed into at all? No, of course not. If anything, people commited much quicker then than they do now. People married younger, had families younger and, quite often, the relationships were not their own choice. This was all expected of them, so they did it. As it was expected, and divorce was less tolerated, relationships lasted. Nothing to do with sex, moreso with societies views and values. Going with this line of thought, then, relationships now are no more screwed than they were in the past, we're just more open about it. One must not presume that early marriage etc was/is all negative, though. Some relationships were of course put together by people other than the couple, and they were rushed into in terms of getting married young and for the purposes of family or money, but the fact still remains that values have changed, and not necessarily for the better. Going back just 20 or 30 years ago, marriages were not forced, yet divorce rate has still been on the increase. Likewise, studies into pre-arranged marriages in other cultures have shown that those couples tend to stay together longer, and love each other more (after some years), than those in Western societies. Again, then, we arrive at the conclusion that maybe we as a society do rush into sex, that if we just took the time to get to know someone, then we'd probably be better off in the long run. It is true to say that sex and relationships tend to go hand in hand. However, in terms of one influencing the other, I'm inclined to believe this is more to do with individual circumstances than a steadfast rule. It does seem the case that there is some truth in my friend's casual musing but, maybe, we're just looking for too much. Girls today aren't content with just finding a nice guy, we seem to want it all. There's all this pressure on guys to be the perfect man, that prince, or knight in shining armour. In other words, we all want what is impossible for us to have. Maybe if we just accept that people aren't perfect and stop finding so many faults in others, then relationships might also have a better chance of working. Not only did sex come later in past generations, but we were also much more content with what we had, and weren't looking for that perfect prince who was never going to come. Instead of sex being the factor, then, maybe we just need to be more accepting of people and their 'quirks'. We all clearly want too much. Is there even such thing as love anymore? Or has that been lost in our constant failed attempts at finding 'Mr. Right'? Do we even give love a chance these days, what with our obsession with all those other 'most important' factors? Was there ever such a thing as love? Would we even know what it was if it suddenly came and kicked us in the gut? And, is love really in line with relationships and marriages?
Yes, that was just a long and random series of thoughts around this subject, making me feel way more like Carrie Bradshaw than I'd perhaps like, but it was written as what my friend said really made me think. Of course, today's society is made up of a bunch of deluded idealists, and another bunch of cynical idiots. Let's just find a happy medium and all this would be solved, yes? ---says the cynic. ;-)
My friend and fellow River Creep tagged me in this picture on Facebook. It struck me how true it is. <3
I think I'll print it when I get the chance, and put it up in my room. My new room, in my new student house. It's looking good so far, a lot more homey now I've got posters and pictures and postcards etc up on the walls, and all my lovely figures on display.
*
** In other news, True Blood is EPIC. I watched the last episode of the third series last night, and can I say 'wow'?! As my friend rightly said, Eric even manages to be sexy covered in cement. I for one cannot wait for the next series.
